Rant.
IrritatedCan I write this here without people getting stupid? I doubt it, but here I go anyway. Plus, only a couple of you will get it.
So I'm back together with Jeremy. What's wrong with that? Nothing. Nada. Yes, I actually do love him. Fancy that. We've been through more bs than anybody should. He's my partner.
Partner.
So why, why, is there a sudden shitstorm? Why is it that I don't even want to talk to one of my best friends because I know I'll only get yelled at? For what, not chaining myself to my schoolwork and hiding in my room? For wanting someone to stick with me through difficult times? For wanting a mutual relationship regarding support, physical closeness, and wishes? Why is there a problem? Contrary to popular belief, I'm not a naive little kid. I know what I'm doing and what I want, and I know the consequences of going too far. I've gotten hurt before, and I'm not afraid of it.
As for Monsieur Antoine... look, I'm sorry if you're jealous, if you're worried, if you hate his guts. I don't care. If you are jealous, you could have asked me many a time. I didn't make my feelings well-hidden. If you hate him, too bad. A lot of people do. If you deem him "not worthy," tough. You're not my mother. And my mother thought the same thing, look how that went. I guess I'm a little pissed at you, too, I mean, you're taking a girl to prom I've never even met, calling her one of your best friends, a sister, like. You didn't come to prom with me because it was "too expensive." Doesn't seem to be hindering you now. How do you think it feels to be suddenly told that your best friend has a hidden person at the same level as you are? I guess I'm a little jealous. A little angry. And you have no right to snarl at me because I'm in a loving relationship. You've hurt me deeper than any person has hurt me - I've had many, many reasons to hate you, to yell at you and cut you to pieces, but I never have. So don't you start in on me.
Please note this was written in hopes that he DOES NOT READ IT. Ok? So all of you who know him, kindly keep his eyes off these words. I'll move them on later.
------------------------------------------------------
[link] Sign my map please?
Just put who you are on dev n.n------------------------------------------------------
CHARACTERS AND REFS (for art trades, etc.)! [link]-------------------------------------------------------
Random stuff:
Wajas id: 4506
Gaia: kuro_okami
PPT: kurookami
-------------------------------------------------------
Clubs:
-------------------------------------------------------
Real life people:
-------------------------------------------------------
ART STATUS Trades: closed [ ] ALWAYS OPEN [X] (if you don't mind waiting a bit... I'm a notorious procrastinator!)
Requests: closed [x] open [ ]
Commissions: closed [x] open [ ]
I will love you forever if you ask for a trade. :3
Commission info! [link]Working on:
= thinking
= sketched = inked = colored = scanned = digitally fixed up = finished!Stuff to dooo:
Trade with
Request for
Trade with
mission: Pokemon Ginjika project on
: 45. Vileplume (female)448. Lucario (male)
Adopts:
1. [EMPTY]
2. [EMPTY]
3. [EMPTY]
4. [EMPTY]
Trades: OPEN
Requests: Clooosed
Note me for waja commission info!
Waiting for:
Trade with
Trade with
Trade with
Trade with
Trade with
Trade with
Trade with
Devious Comments
I will say that I was surprised when I read that you were back with Jeremy. I know you two had been very very verrry close at the beginning, then really knew nothing until your mother started harassing you for the relationship, and then the break. I will admit that you seemed glad to be distanced from Jeremy and to have him out of your care, out of your hall, and not at your side every waking second, but you didn't seem to have a vile hate or dislike of him. I believe that coming back home and having anthony around as another physical being was comforting to you and a on top of that, he represented home, something you missed. He was a physical piece of home that you could associate with and Jeremy was really just the opposite. Hopefully this time around, you guys can space things out and not get too much of one another. It's good for you to have someone like jeremy to be there for you when you're so far away from home at BU.
The thing I'm mad about is Anthony's reaction to it all, really.
--
"I assure you, I am cone sold stober!" ~Howl
Lovely icon made by =prismchan.
Jeremy was two seconds away from splitting up with you 'for real' not just temporarily (he told me so himself), when you guys decided to take a break. Sorry, hun, but I don't think he cares for you the way you've convinced yourself you care for him. And I don't think you care for him as much as you say. But if you want to delude yourself in your happy little daydream, be my guest.
Maybe you think you're being mature, but I have yet to see it...
I don't know who you are, but I'm guessing you're someone at BU since you know Jeremy personally and have spoken to him as stated. I've known Maria for five years now and I believe that she is in fact being quite mature on the subject and I shall stand to defend her.
Just because you believe this and that doesn't make it a truth nor does it give you the right to call her immature. She's certainly not one of the more immature people I know. And since you're saying '...sounds to me like...', I'll add in my own. To me, it sounds like you're trying to keep them apart and that you may be the immature and jealous figure here. You put her down many a times instead of writing a well thought response. If you didn't think it was a good thing for them to get back together, you certainly should be able to wirte that in a more educated way.
Find people that you trust, and listen to their advice. Of course still think for yourself, but weigh their opinions highly if you think that much of them.
Ignore the naysayers so long as they don't provide valid arguments.
Do what makes you happy, not what makes everyone else happy, but know why you're doing it. If it means that much to you, your real friends will agree eventually.
I wish I could say it gets easier when you get older, but not always. As long as you learn from everything you go through, and don't repeat the parts you're not proud of, everything will come together in the long run.
If I came off sounding angry, it's only because I worry about her so much. I only want her happiness and I believe she knows she's not on the path to it, but doesn't want to admit she's wrong.
Before her and Jeremy took their break, he told me he could in no way fathom a future between them. He was very much so ready to break up with her when they took a break. I'm sorry if I'm being judgmental or hot-headed, but that doesn't seem like the type of behavior one desires in a relationship, and it certainly doesn't seem like someone who is worthy of Maria.
It's obvious that you also care about Maria a lot, and wish to defend her, and I respect that very much. The fact of the matter is, I don't believe her and Jeremy's relationship is healthy, and I'm not going to stand by and lie and pretend to be happy for them when I think she's just going to get hurt. That would go against everything I believe friendship should be.
Friends should tell the truth to each other, protect each other, and yes, be mean when they have to to jolt the other out of their ruts. I know she'd do the same for me.
I apologize if I offended you (or Maria) in any way. That obviously was not my goal.
Thank you for responding. Sometimes I forget that when I'm trying to jolt people out of their own silliness they take my words too seriously. I honestly do not think Maria is being immature or stupid. She is simply lost and needs a helping hand.
Again, thank you for your words and I apologize.
Sincerely,
Callie
Previous PageNext Page